I love everything about my life

These kids are cracking me up daily! I love coming home from busy work day and playing with them instead of being productive and doing other things. They really are BEST! I love it

Here's some pics:

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They have been my little buddies all year long, and I definitely couldn't have done it without them!

Working, Training, Buying

I find it kind of scary that I feel like my life is getting boring. 

I mean, I just commute 2 hours a day...work full time...train for a marathon...and buy a house. Sounds like my life needs more excitement right?

Oh, and I have this awesome nerve problem in my neck and back, so I haven't been able to feel my right arm for about a month, so I've been getting that worked on 2 nights a week.

I'm just so boring! Seriously, if I don't have every minute of every day planned, I get bored with my life. I've got issues. 

Lately, I have been running at ski resorts up the trails to the lifts. Talk about killer leg work outs!

I've had the stomach flu the past few days, so my I haven't been very "formal" at work...but that's never been my thing!

Even with the stomach flu, I still managed to get a few night runs in!! 

Running really just makes me so happy, and I'm so glad it has become a priority every day for me again! My shoes and I have a lot to catch up on!

Wisdom

The past 365 days have been 100% the hardest days of my entire life. I experienced so many things that I never thought I would experience. There were days it was almost unbearable to even want to have the desire to simply exist. There were days were I felt completely hopeless and crushed by my challenges and struggles. There were days were I truly did not believe I was strong enough to even endure trials and struggles. There were days where I simply just put my foot down and gave up. I challenged God to make a me a believer again. I challenged those closest to me to continue to love me in spite of my challenges and shortcomings. To say the least, this past year didn't go quite as planned...at all. 

But I learned HEAPS of wisdom I think is important to document: 

• Love will always and forever be the answer. I can't even think about all of the love and support I have had this past year without getting choked up. People never gave up on me, even when I had completely given up on myself. Some days it was just a text from  a close friend acknowledging me. Just to be reminded that I mattered was HUGE. 

• Performance isn't everything. I have always tried to live this perfect little life and perform in order to gain self esteem and confidence. I could accomplish every single goal I set out to do, but was still empty inside. No performance that you do will ever change your inner voice. It starts with loving your unsuccessful, flawed self. That's when you can begin to live a full life without all of the trophies and championships and still go to bed feeling accomplished and content. 

• I am not invincible. I am human and make mistakes just like everyone else. Just because I followed commandments and went to church growing up, God doesn't just give me a "pass" card from all of the crap that we have to go through on this earth. It just means that he knew I was capable of enduring more, and he would be able to shape me into exactly who he wanted me to come through the personal trials I have had.

• Also along those lines...God isn't Santa Clause. You aren't simply on the "Naughty" or "Nice" list and should expect blessings or curses based on your behaviors. He is not this magical man that comes and gives all of the good little children blessings for reading their scriptures. That's just not how it works. We read scriptures and pray, not to get presents from God, but to develop a personal relationship with someone who is more than willing to be our partner in life and hold our hands through difficult trials. He is my best friend, my dad, and my confident. I look to him for each and every decision. I don't simply believe he should give me more because I say prayers more. 

• Be grateful. When things get tough, it is SO HARD to be grateful. But when you go through days of not being able to even get out of bed, it truly is a miracle just to be able to get out of the house one day. It is the small things that I have tried to be grateful for that make life worth living. For instance, I am very grateful for: my bluetooth, music, hoodies, snapchat, and delicious food. Those are the things that get put off to the side when you get really down in the dumps, but if you can pick out one small thing a day to be grateful for, you will be amazed at how much you really do have. 

So there's my random rant about a few things I have learned about life this past year. I am a completely different person. I have become closer to God, become more compassionate, become a lot less judgmental, and most importantly...I have come to really know who I am and how to utilize my strengths and strengthen my weaknesses. 

My New Theme This Year Is: FEARLESS

GRATEFUL

I am so grateful for my little sidekicks I get to see almost every single day. 

I am grateful for my job and how much confidence it gives me. 

I am grateful for all of the talents I have been given that lead me to so many opportunities that I am so lucky to have. 

I am also very grateful for a healthy body and my ability to utilize my endurance and strength to train for a marathon. 

I'm a pretty lucky kid.

The sunsets on my runs have been AMAZING lately!

She didn't want to come in for dinner because she was too busy....

There really is nothing better than a longer Friday evening run after an insane work week. I love my job, but the only way to stay sane is by downloading new music and going on some looooong runs! 

These are by far my most favorite I have ever had!

Rewards for good behavior in this house typically involves getting to have slumber parties with Kelli. 

These kids think I'm the best cook, because of my S'more making skills! It took Rylie an entire hour to finally finish hers, because she didn't know how to eat it and hold it without gettin messy!

All Good Things

So many grand things happening right now. Let me tell you my life story via pictures ok?

My hair is blonde again. I may or may not have changed my hair SOLEY to find out if my hunch that a certain guy was gay...and when he noticed it and complimented me, I knew my hunch had to be true. 

Once upon a time, I found this AMAZINGLY cute townhouse in Sandy and put a great offer on it...only to find out there were multiple offers all at the same time and my offer got second place to someone with a larger down payment. THEN, I found a townhouse four doors down for $10,000 less with the same floor plan and got all my closing costs paid for. I am pretty stoked that I can now remodel my new place exactly how I want it with the money I am saving on the price! In about a month, I will be a homeowner. Whhhaaaat?!

Don't even get me started on how sad I am going to miss my little roommates!

Where did summer go?

I am running the Big Cottonwood Marathon the week I close on my townhouse. This next month is going to be ridiculous!

I'm trying reaaaalllllly hard to live by this!

Luke and I went the Real Salt Lake game last night! I don't know what's better...people watching, or soccer watching....

This kid got BAPTIZED last weekend! I can't believe how old she is getting!